Companion

Friday I had to have our 15 1/2 year old wolfdog Lightning put to sleep.  I had been dreading this as I thought it was going to be a very emotional upset for Bob. Turns out--It has been far worse for me then Bob. Lightning was my evening companion. After Bob would go to bed, I would sit down to "unwind" and Lightning would sit as close as she could with her chin on my thigh. It was very comforting.
 Bob does not even seem to comprehend she is gone. Every hour or so he will walk to the door, or go out to the back yard and whistle for her. I will gently remind that she is no longer with us and he will repy " Oh- I didnt know that" and he will go sit back down.
My evenings have become even more lonely without my dog. Just when I think I have no more tears... they well to the surface.
I am an emotional train wreck. I really miss her.